by Marcia Gibbons >> CATCH UP ON PREVIOUS DAY
1 Samuel 25 The Message (MSG)
14-17 Meanwhile, one of the young shepherds told Abigail, Nabal’s wife, what had happened: “David sent messengers from the backcountry to salute our master, but he tore into them with insults. Yet these men treated us very well. They took nothing from us and didn’t take advantage of us all the time we were in the fields. They formed a wall around us, protecting us day and night all the time we were out tending the sheep. Do something quickly because big trouble is ahead for our master and all of us. Nobody can talk to him. He’s impossible—a real brute!”
18-19 Abigail flew into action. She took two hundred loaves of bread, two skins of wine, five sheep dressed out and ready for cooking, a bushel of roasted grain, a hundred raisin cakes, and two hundred fig cakes, and she had it all loaded on some donkeys. Then she said to her young servants, “Go ahead and pave the way for me. I’m right behind you.” But she said nothing to her husband Nabal.
Additional Studies and Recommended Reading
Step 1: Understand Why Your Partner Is Being Stubborn.
Maybe you aren’t seeing the logic behind your spouse’s decisions. Try to see it in their perspective. Sometimes our judgment gets clouded by anger or frustration.
What are you missing? When you are learning how to deal with a stubborn spouse, remember that being in a relationship means you are ready to work out your differences and make sacrifices.
You are bound to have some differences; but trying to understand where your partner is coming from is the first step to resolving these.
Step 2: Pick Your Battles.
When your spouse just won’t back down, don’t waste your time trying to argue, nag, yell or complain otherwise.
If it means too much to your partner, let them know that you support them this time. Make them understand, however, that when the time comes that you are in the same position and it means more to you, you would ask their support in return. Choose your priorities and be willing to “lose” the rest.
Step 3: Take A Positive Approach.
The key to knowing how to deal with a stubborn spouse is to avoid hostility or violence of any kind. Fighting or freaking out is never the answer. Hot tempers will only bring about verbal or maybe even physical attacks.
The important thing is to keep a cool and level head, so that you would be able to talk or negotiate the issue calmly and reasonably. There is nothing a good talk can’t solve.
One way you can tip the balance in your favor is to present new evidence or proof that confirms the validity of your point. Oftentimes, ego gets in their way; but when you present new proof, their agreement will be perceived in light of that evidence and not because they changed their mind.
Learning how to deal with a stubborn spouse, especially when they tend to become narrow-minded, can be challenging. However, be patient and keep in mind that learning how to handle this power struggle can guarantee a happy and successful relationship.
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